HAIL to the King Chewbacca Von Wookie, may God preserve him.
Today, two monkey women came to the King Chewbacca, fighting over a baby. Each claimed it was theirs.
I decreed the monkey youngling should be chopped in half, desperately hoping the real monkey mother would give up her rights so her precious would be saved.
After the monstrous deed had been committed, a third monkey climbed up the tree, wailing that somebody had stolen her baby.
I feel like a monster.