“You can make it on a wish”

bus stop.jpg
My bus stop.

TODAY was the day.

I wasn’t sure it was going to happen, the moment where I know moving to Peru was the right thing for me. Until today I had my doubts. I didn’t quite belong. I lost my self-esteem in a strange world away from my former position and possessions while somehow keeping the ego and pride.

Pride. So much pride.

“Pride: What I think you think about me. Self-esteem: what I think about myself. Personal relationships: the script I give others.” -Russell Brand, Recovery

I was on the bus to work this morning listening to my Ipod. Before spilling coffee on my shirt I listened to a song that’s been on my Itunes almost two years which I somehow overlooked. Goo Goo Dolls hasn’t interested me since I listened to Iris in City of Angels (Nick Cage as an angel who falls in love with a mortal.) and their 2016 Boxes album felt cheesy, artificial and empty in its commercialism filled with poignant titles such as Prayer in my Pocket. That’s how I had overlooked this song.

“For the first time I feel like someone
Breaking down the walls in my own mind
Keeping my faith for the bad times
Get up, get up, stand like a champion
Take it to the world………you can make it on a wish if you want to.”

-So Alive, by Goo Goo Dolls

And as I was listening to this song I had a moment. A moment of happiness looking out the bus and feeling the best part of myself. There was a glow within. I had the spark.


Huanchaco sunrise.jpg
The sun rises over the mountains as I stare out the bus with my coffee and while listening to my music.

My translator at work has been teaching me basic Spanish. Today she helped me with the alphabet, which was the advice of blogger Collins, who commented on a recent post of mine.

“The basics as you of course know, and that is so boring, yet it’s so essential, is to practice the Spanish ABC/vowels and consonants each and every day as the sound/melody of a language is so crucial in learning and speaking it,” Collins said.

I never bothered learning the Spanish alphabet, which is rather deceptive in that I assumed it was the same as the English alphabet. “Thank goodness for that,” I thought. The problem is some letters are pronounced differently.

G seems to be more like the ‘he’ in hello. H seems to be silent at the start of a word. J is…what the heck is J? In my notes I’ve spelled my pronounciation as ‘Hawta’.


I suppose being in a reflective mood, and possibly still a little self-absorbed, I wondered something today. I’ll be here for at least a year. What do I need to learn in that time? What is it I need to take away from my time in Peru?’